Category: Uncategorized

Times Flies September 21

Author’s Day

Arrivals:

1866 – H. G. Wells, an author who, like Jules Verne, was one of the greatest science fiction writers of all time.  His novels and non-fiction (Anticipation [1901]) successfully predicted all kinds of things that we take for granted in the 21st century.  He also wrote two books, Floor Wars and Little Wars, which virtually invented that notorious time eater: recreational war gaming.

1947 – Stephen King, a contemporary novelist.  His books are so frightening that you don’t even have to read them.  Even if they just sit on your bookshelf in the basement, they scare the hell out of you.

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1897 – To all those people yippin’ and moanin’ when Christmas shows up at Costco and Wal-mart the day after Hallowe’en this appeared in the New York Sun newspaper on this date in 1897.  It was written by Virginia O’Hanlon and Francis Pharcellus Church.

“DEAR EDITOR: I am 8 years old.
“Some of my little friends say there is no Santa Claus.
“Papa says, ‘If you see it in THE SUN it’s so.’
“Please tell me the truth; is there a Santa Claus?
VIRGINIA O’HANLON.
“…. Yes, VIRGINIA, there is a Santa Claus. He exists as certainly as love and generosity and devotion exist, and you know that they abound and give to your life its highest beauty and joy. Alas! how dreary would be the world if there were no Santa Claus. It would be as dreary as if there were no VIRGINIAS. There would be no childlike faith then, no poetry, no romance to make tolerable this existence. We should have no enjoyment, except in sense and sight. The eternal light with which childhood fills the world would be extinguished. …”

Now don’t you feel foolish.  So just shut up and enjoy yourself.

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1937 – J.R.R. Tolkien’s The Hobbit was published by George Allen & Unwin Ltd.  The original press run was 1,500 and the book contained original drawings by Tolkien who also designed the cover and the dust jacket.  In 2010, if you had a copy of that 1st Edition in mint condition, you would have enough money to buy the Shire and put all of the hobbits to work as slaves.

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19 BCE – Virgil, whose epic poem The Aeneid ranks with The Iliad and The Odyssey as the bases of all European literature.  Although he was once considered essential reading for any educated person, he is mostly ignored today.  He is not even remembered for his contribution to the clichés of our language – “Omnia vincit amor” or “Love conquers all” and “Facilis descensus Averni” (“the road to Hell is paved”).

1832 – Sir Walter Scott, an early 19th century, Scottish author, who re-invented chivalry with his novel Ivanhoe (1819) and invented Scottish Highland culture with Rob Roy (1817).  His works were so popular that by the time Queen Victoria showed up in 1837, his romantic version of history was widely accepted and set the standard for many of the attitudes of the Victorian Age.

Time Flies September 20

Arrivals:

1934 – Sophia Loren, undoubtedly the sexiest grandma on the planet.  She has been in the spotlight for six decades as an actress, a business woman, an author and a singer.  She was the first person to market her own perfume, Sophia.  She has won an Oscar for Best Actress, served a short prison term for tax evasion, written cookbooks and designed jewellery.  Her marriage to Carlo Ponti was annulled to avoid criminal charges of bigamy (they remarried after Ponti’s divorce was final) and her latest adventures include the movie Nine, a promise to do a strip tease if her favourite soccer team S.S.C. Napoli won the Serie B championship and an incredible (even with airbrushing) cheesecake photo appearance on the Pirelli Calendar 2007.

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1519 – Ferdinand Magellan, with five ships and 234 men, set sail from Spain, going west to the Spice Islands.   The voyage ended 3 years later when one ship and 18 crewmen returned to Spain from the east.  Magellan has been honoured ever since as the first man to circumnavigate the globe — except… he didn’t do it.  Magellan was killed in the Philippines, and it was his navigator, Juan Sebastian Elcano, who decided, after a year or so at sea, that Spain had to be closer if they just kept sailing west.  Obviously it worked, but Magellan got credit for it.  Rumour has it that, unfortunately, Elcano was a Basque, and the Spanish didn’t much like them — even in those days.

1973 – The Battle of the Sexes tennis match between Billie Jean King and Bobby Riggs took place at the Houston Astrodome in front of a huge (for the time) worldwide audience of 50 million.  Billie Jean had been goaded into the match by self-proclaimed tennis hustler 55-year-old Bobby Riggs, who’d been yipping about how bad women’s tennis was for years.  King, who was at the top of her game, beat the old bugger in straight sets, and he was never heard of again.

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1863 – Jakob Grimm, who, with his brother Wilhelm, wrote Kinder-und Hausmachen or Children’s and Household Tales in 1812.  They are the Brothers Grimm, and their book, in its many incarnations, is called Grimm’s Fairy Tales.  Oddly enough, the abundant references to sex and violence in the original had to be toned down for children in subsequent editions.   These days, even some of the toned-down versions are considered unsuitable for kids by the politically correct crowd, and many of the stories are out of favour.

1973 – Jim Croce, a spectacular musical talent.  In the two or so years before his death, he recorded three albums with a number of hit songs, including, “Bad Bad, Leroy Brown”, “Time in a Bottle”, “Operator” and “I Have a Name.”  He was killed, flying from Louisiana to Texas, when the pilot of the airplane had a heart attack during take-off.

Time Flies September 19

Arrivals:

1980 – Hermione Granger, Harry Potter`s little friend at Hogwarts.  She is also one half of a blossoming romance with Ron Weasley, the other corner of JK Rowling`s schooldays trio.  Generally seen as a new generation role model, Hermione has established smart and accomplished as desirable qualities for girls.  There is some controversy as to the year of her birth, but remember, people, she`s fictional.

1949 – Lesley Hornby, who, disguised as Twiggy, succeeded Jean Shrimpton as THE supermodel of the 60s.  And I`m not going to say anything about what kind of a message her super skinny, mournful waif look sent to the young girls and women of her generation and beyond.

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1692 – During the Salem Witch Trials, Giles Corey was accused of the felony of witchcraft, and when he refused to enter a plea, the Tribunal sentenced him to be crushed by heavy stones until he confessed.  Unfortunately, Corey, who was probably having trouble breathing under the weight, died before he could change his mind.  Ironically, despite 29 convictions, 19 executions and Giles Corey, no witches were harmed during the Salem Witch Trials.
1982 – Scott Fahlman proposed the Emoticons 🙂 and 😦 as a way of distinguishing humorous comments from real on-line discussion, and, in 3 keystrokes, added tone of voice and body language to e-mails.  Now in common usage most programs replace them with Happy Faces.

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Departures:

1968 – Chester Carlson who invented the XeroX (original spelling) machine which made document copying a push button away, thus changing history and making him the father of all those hilarious office memos and jokes which circulated everywhere until they were replaced by e-mail.

1995 – Orville Redenbacher, whose passion for popcorn brought that really cool movie theatre popcorn into our homes via the microwave.  It`s not quite as good as the stuff we used to munch on at the movies, but it`s quick and easy and the closest thing we`re ever going to get these days.