Top 15 Jokes Of 2017
There’s enough going wrong in the world this week that even we optimists are getting the Windex out to clean our rose-coloured glasses. Just when we thought things couldn’t get any worse – they did. People are starting to read Kafka for laughs and Cormac McCarthy is beginning to look downright lighthearted. However, rather than dwell on the obvious let’s stop for a moment, pour a beverage and relax.
Remember, August is that time of year when the local folks of Edinburgh rent their houses out for mucho dinero and bugger off to Spain; chased out of their town by the Edinburgh Fringe Festival. For those of you who’ve never heard of the Edinburgh Fringe Festival, that’s too bad because it’s the greatest mish-mash of all-things-considered in the world. The Edinburgh Fringe is actually several coexisting arts festivals that run amok, day and night, through the streets of Edinburgh for the entire month of August. It was started in the late 1940s by some university students, and even though it’s become internationally huge, it still maintains its undergraduate Alphagetti-for-breakfast air.
One of the biggest parts of The Fringe is comedy; some good, some bad, some awful. And for the last few years, it has produced a Top Ten [Fifteen] list of the funniest jokes of the Festival. This is this year’s offering. So, as the world continues to spin, tune out for a second and remember we’re still the funniest species on the planet. (oddly enough, this was written in 2011)
The top 15 funniest jokes from the Fringe (2017)
- “I’m not a fan of the new pound coin, but then again, I hate all change” – Ken Cheng
- “Trump’s nothing like Hitler. There’s no way he could write a book” – Frankie Boyle
- “I’ve given up asking rhetorical questions. What’s the point?” – Alexei Sayle
- “I’m looking for the girl next door type. I’m just gonna keep moving house till I find her” – Lew Fitz
- “I like to imagine the guy who invented the umbrella was going to call it the ‘brella’. But he hesitated” – Andy Field
- “Combine Harvesters. And you’ll have a really big restaurant” – Mark Simmons
- “I’m rubbish with names. It’s not my fault, it’s a condition. There’s a name for it…” – Jimeoin
- “I have two boys, 5 and 6. We’re no good at naming things in our house” – Ed Byrne
- “I wasn’t particularly close to my dad before he died… which was lucky, because he trod on a land mine” – Olaf Falafel
- “Whenever someone says, ‘I don’t believe in coincidences.’ I say, ‘Oh my God, me neither!”‘ – Alasdair Beckett-King
- “A friend tricked me into going to Wimbledon by telling me it was a men’s singles event” – Angela Barnes
- “As a vegan, I think people who sell meat are disgusting; but apparently people who sell fruit and veg are grocer” – Adele Cliff
- “For me dying is a lot like going camping. I don’t want to do it” – Phil Wang
- “I wonder how many chameleons snuck onto the Ark” – Adam Hess
- “I went to a Pretenders gig. It was a tribute act” – Tim Vine
7 comments on “Top 15 Jokes Of 2017”
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I’m still giggling over #5!
Sounds like a wild festival. Have you ever gone?
No, but friends have and according to them it’s Monty Python meets Billy Connolly.
Number 5,12,15 had me chuckling out loud. Thanks for the humour.
I will copy your Mister T. story.
Kind regards,
Love it, giggled reading them all.
My American neighbour told me that Mister T. wrote some management books.
I gather they are not very impressive …
Kind regards,
I think he put his name on them but whether he wrote them or not is still up in the air.