Tag: Trivia

Puzzle — Movie Quotes

Meanwhile in Vancouver, Canada, the snow has turned to freezing rain.  The streets look like somebody spilled a gigantic dirt and dishwater daiquiri.  It’s been a week since I’ve done anything but shovel.  I’ve eaten all the chocolate, all the cookies and all the leftover Christmas candy.  This is my last bag of Doritos and my last Pepsi.  Now I know how the boys of Terra Nova felt.  (Too soon?)  But, if I’m going to go down, I’m going to go down swinging, testing the mettle of my electronic friends.

puzzle-snow

This is a movie quote puzzle.  Here are 11 quotes from 11 movies and the 11 actors and actresses who spoke them.  You have to match the quote to the actor or actress and then name the movie.  This is moderately difficult.  Hint: Use the process of elimination.

So, if you like, answer all the questions correctly and use Contact Me to send me your answers.  The first person to get all of them correct (100%) will be awarded a signed copy of The Woman in the Window — everybody else will bask in the knowledge that they did a good job.  The contest ends at noon on Monday Feb. 13, 2017 (Vangroovy time.)  Answers next week.  Good luck!

1 — “You gonna do somethin’ or just stand there and bleed?”

2 — “And tomorrow we come back and cut off your Johnson.”

3 — “Go away — or I shall taunt you a second time.”

4 — “You are a sad, strange, little man and you have my pity.”

5 — “Looking at the cake is like looking at the future. Until you’ve tasted it, what do you really know– and then, of course, it’s too late.

6 — “Shut up and deal.”

7 — “It’s always gonna be somethin’ with you, isn’t it Joe?”

8 — “You people! If there isn’t a movie about it, it’s not worth knowing– is it?”

9 — “I don’t know how to shut down a neutron reactor — and unless you took a Learning Annex course I don’t know about, I’m pretty sure you don’t know how to shut down  a neutron reactor, either.”

10 — “Get off my lawn!”

11 — “It’s not the years; it’s the mileage.”

———————————————–

A — Sigourney Weaver

B — John Cleese

C — Harrison Ford

D — Clint Eastwood

E — Peter Stormare

F — Kurt Russell

G — Meg Ryan

H — Tim Allen

I — Shirley MacLaine

J — Alan Rickman

K — Nicol Williamson

Easter Trivia II

romania-599437_1280Once again, in keeping with my avowed principle that my readers should go to bed smarter than when they woke up, here are some cool facts about Easter and environs.  Pass this information on between mouthfuls of chocolate and you’ll either look like the smartest person in the room or a pompous ass — your choice.

The tastiest parts of the Easter bunny are the ears, followed by the nose.  This is one of those stupid facts that has actually been statistically verified by years of research.  Why?  Go figure!

On average, North Americans consume over 90 million Easter bunnies every year.  However, this incredible number does include those cheap bastards who buy their bunnies on Monday — when they’re half price.

The first European tourist on Easter Island was Dutch explorer Jacob Roggeveen, in 1722.  He named the island Paasch Eyland (Easter Island) when he mistakenly thought all the large stone statues (Moai) he saw there were waiting for the Easter Bunny.

And speaking of Moai: if you want to make a million dollars, next Easter make a bunch of chocolate Moai and sell them to esoterically obsessed hipsters.  These folks have tons of disposable cash and simply can’t pass up a chance to be ironic.  (FYI, this is my idea.  If you do make a million dollars, I want a Finder’s Fee!)

The name Easter actually comes from the pagan goddess of fertility, Eastre, whose symbols were the rabbit and the egg.  Early Christians (marketing geniuses, BTW) saw an opportunity to piggyback their Holy Week resurrection message on the numerous Spring Festivals already established across Europe.  They slowly pushed Eastre into the background, and 17 centuries later, all we have left are chocolate bunnies, coloured eggs and a misspelt name.

Over one billion jellybeans will be eaten this Easter.  That sound you hear is the American Dental Association cashing their cheques and buying luxury condos.

Of the 50 or so obscenely opulent Faberge eggs produced for the Russian Royal Family, 8 are still missing.  So, next time you have to endure an afternoon with your great-aunt Olga, take a snoop through her china cabinet — you might get lucky.  These things sell for tens of millions of dollars, and if she doesn’t know it’s there, chances are good she won’t miss it.

And finally: Parents, decorating eggs with your children at Easter is a wonderful activity.  It will demonstrate just exactly what kind of a wacko control freak you really are.

Happy Easter!

St. Patrick’s Day Trivia — II

pub-483944_1280It takes more than a green t-shirt and a belly full of beer to make you Irish on St. Patrick’s Day.  Well, no.  Actually, it doesn’t.  However, if you want to appear to be more than just a Liam-come-lately to the party, you need to know a little bit about the Emerald Isle.  Here are a few quick and dirties to help you out:

“I’ll Take You Home Again, Kathleen,” that great Irish ballad, was written in Indiana by Thomas Westendorf, a German-American (whose wife’s name, BTW, was Jennie.)

The O’Connell Bridge across the River Liffey is the only bridge in Europe that’s wider than it is long.

The windmills in Ireland turn clockwise, which is exactly the opposite of the way they turn everyplace else on the planet.

What’s the difference between Bono and God?  God doesn’t walk around acting as if he’s Bono.

There are two official languages in Ireland: English and Irish.  Most stuff is bilingual and everybody speaks English, but if you act like a jackass, especially in the West Country, you might find yourself facing a solid wall of no comprendo Gaelic.  Just sayin’.

The Guinness Book of World Records holds the Guinness World Record for books most often stolen from public libraries.

In Dublin, between 6 pm Friday and 3 am Monday, approximately 10,000 pints of beer are consumed — every hour.

The remains of St Valentine (who isn’t a saint, anymore)are in Ireland.  You can visit the shrine at Whitefriar Street Church in Dublin.

And speaking of saints, Saint Patrick isn’t one.  There is no evidence that St. Patrick was ever canonized.

And, hold on to your shillelagh: Saint Patrick wasn’t even Irish!  In fact, chances are good, he was — OMG — English.

A word to the wise though: don’t go spouting those last two nuggets of knowledge promiscuously around the pub.  It just might put the ire in your Irish friends — permanently.  As my great uncle used to say, “You never want to give a Celt an opportunity to hate you.”  Sound advice.

Happy St. Patrick’s Day.